We had to do modeling work once or twice a month.
Every time new items or trendy clothes came out, we had to do a photoshoot, and every time I brought clothes, they started overflowing before I knew it.
Shi-hyun-nim, seeing me bringing clothes every time, even told me to stop bringing them now.
Even I thought I brought too much. Most of the clothes Shi-hyun-nim already had went to the back of the closet, and the clothes I brought took their place.
Thanks to that, Shi-hyun-nim's attire became quite stylish. Every time we went on a date, I was dressed up, but Shi-hyun-nim's attire was too casual, so I felt unbalanced, but now I felt like my attire was lacking.
One day, while I was being worked so hard, Mi-ra-ssi said something strange.
,"Don't you want to shoot a pictorial?"
,"Why a pictorial all of a sudden?"
It was too out of the blue. I already found modeling work annoying, but a pictorial?
,"Since we keep using you as models, some people are showing interest."
,"Really?"
Still, a pictorial for us, who are just ordinary people? I couldn't understand.
,"Aren't pictorials for famous celebrities or models?"
,"That's for commercial use, and there are cases where people shoot them personally. For example, wedding photoshoots can also be called pictorials."
Ah, is that so? I didn't know at all... But if someone else wants to photograph us, isn't that for commercial use?
,"But the person who wants to photograph us, isn't that for commercial purposes?"
Mi-ra-ssi subtly avoided my gaze.
,"It is, isn't it!?"
,"Yes, it is."
,"Y-you're trying to sell us off!?"
,"That's not it, people are just saying they want to use you as models here and there."
I glared at Mi-ra-ssi.
,"I'm just asking for your opinion, you can just refuse if you don't want to."
I knew it, she was planning to sell us off! That's why she's reacting like that!
But I couldn't get angry.
If Mi-ra-ssi had wanted to deceive me, she could have easily done so and had us photographed. But seeing that she asked for my opinion first, it seems she didn't intend to go that far.
,"Christmas is coming up soon."
,"That's right."
Peaceful autumn passed, and cold winter came. Winter was a season of many worries for me.
It's strange, but there are so many events, or what should I say? There were many things to take care of.
My birthday isn't something I need to worry about, but there were many things to prepare for Christmas, Shi-hyun-nim's birthday, the Great Gate, Valentine's Day, and even our wedding anniversary.
,"There are many places that want to shoot a Christmas-themed pictorial."
Christmas-themed? Santa Girl immediately came to mind.
The costume was so dirty that I had to throw it away... Suddenly, thinking about that made me blush with shame.
,"That's why I asked."
,"I'm not doing it."
Santa Girl is out! Absolutely not! At my refusal, Mi-ra-ssi started bringing out the second option.
,"How about this? A wedding-themed pictorial."
,"I said I'm not doing it, didn't I?"
,"Wedding too? I prepared it because I heard you've never worn a wedding dress."
Since we didn't have a wedding ceremony, it's true that I haven't worn one.
But since I was originally a man, I didn't really have any fantasies about wedding dresses.
I guess it's right that I wouldn't.
I haven't even thought about wedding dresses....
,"In the end, you're going to sell that to someone else, right? Then I don't want to."
,"Too bad."
,"What is?"
,"It's a chance to try on various types of wedding dresses, don't say anything later."
,"I won't, I won't."
I was grateful that Mi-ra-ssi said that, thinking of me. Mi-ra-ssi seemed to be glaring at me.
Should I say she seemed dissatisfied?
,"Don't say anything later."
,"I said I'm not doing it, didn't I?"
I observed Mi-ra-ssi while doing modeling work that day, and she seemed a bit on edge.
Could it be that day? I was too scared of Mi-ra-ssi to ask.
*
As I busily spent the winter, spring came before I knew it.
I also realized how difficult it is to celebrate events every year. I gave up on doing anything special and focused on spending time together appropriately.
I knew that was enough to be happy. Still, there was a part of me that felt regretful.
Many things changed during the winter.
First of all, both of us got stronger as our stats increased. I heard that stats don't usually increase this well, but we kept growing steadily.
My Strength increased, and Shi-hyun-nim's Stamina increased. Damn it! I should have gotten Stamina too!
Nighttime activities were already hard enough, but after Shi-hyun-nim's Stamina increased, I couldn't handle it. Of course, Shi-hyun-nim didn't show it, but I could see in his expression that he wasn't satisfied.
So, I wished for Stamina to increase as a reward for the Great Gate, but unfortunately, my Endurance increased.
Damn it, damn it! I really regretted it when I thought about that time.
It was hard to deal with Shi-hyun-nim with just the increase in Endurance. The limit my body could handle increased a bit, but it was meaningless since my Stamina couldn't keep up.
We went on an overseas trip for our wedding anniversary.
We went to Japan, a nearby country, but there were many troublesome procedures.
In particular, Shi-hyun-nim had many obstacles, and I could see the government's response, being anxious about him being leaked abroad even though it was just for travel purposes.
Shi-hyun-nim said it was just for travel purposes, but they didn't seem to believe him.
They said there were many Hunters who said that 15 years ago and never returned?
In the end, we got permission and went on the trip. There was just an embassy employee who came every day to check our location.
Overseas travel was nothing special except for the fact that we couldn't communicate. It seemed to be because we were already traveling around the country in a travel atmosphere.
We made many memories, and as many photos started to hang on the wall. It was a happy life.
Until a certain point... Mi-ra-ssi and my brother's wedding date was set. They said it would be in May.
At first, when I heard the news, I congratulated them. Of course, I should congratulate them! He's my brother and friend.
The problem was after that.
Getting married meant having a wedding ceremony, and having a wedding ceremony required various preparations.
Well, I thought it was natural to have a grand wedding at a hotel. Mi-ra-ssi told me that it was inevitably grand because of my brother's fame rather than because he was a chaebol. These days, the richer you are, the more simple you prefer to do it.
That wasn't the problem.
Yes, a photo that flew in in the spring was the problem.
It was a photo of Mi-ra-ssi wearing a wedding dress. Was she trying to show off? Or did she just want to show me that look? I don't know the reason, but she sent me that photo.
I replied that it was well taken to Mi-ra-ssi's question asking if it was well taken.
,"Shi-hyun-ah, look at this, Mi-ra-ssi's wedding dress photo."
,"Oh, pretty."
,"Right? My brother is really blessed."
Something about looking at Mi-ra-ssi's photo made my heart sink.
,"I introduced them, but I never thought it would really turn out like this."
,"A wedding dress.... It's really pretty."
,"Really?"
,"Yeah, my brother, who I thought would be a bachelor forever, is getting married before I knew it."
The more I looked at Mi-ra-ssi's beautiful and happy expression in the wedding dress, the more my heart sank. This feeling is... jealousy. I felt jealousy when I saw Mi-ra-ssi's photo.
Why was that? She's my friend? She's family now?
At that moment, I was confused because I didn't know my own heart well.
The confused heart was not resolved in a day.
I couldn't find an answer even after worrying for over a week. It was fortunate that I could forget that feeling when I was busy going on expeditions.
Shi-hyun-nim, who thought it was strange that I was worrying every day, asked me a question.
,"What are you so worried about these days?"
,"Ah..., sorry."
,"Is it a worry you can't tell me about?"
Should I tell Shi-hyun-nim about my worries? No, absolutely not.
Would Shi-hyun-nim know the feelings I don't know? And jealousy on top of that, I didn't want to be caught with such an ugly heart.
,"No, it's okay."
Why was I jealous of Mi-ra-ssi?
I worried for a few more days, but Shi-hyun-nim was too worried, so I decided to bury it. I was also able to forget it because Mi-ra-ssi didn't send any more photos.
*
After April, May came quickly.
When I was young, I felt like each day was long, but because I was living a busy life, it passed really quickly.
That's right! Before I knew it, my brother and Mi-ra-ssi's wedding was just around the corner!
,"I guess I have to go, right?"
The feeling I was trying to forget came back to me.
Jealousy towards Mi-ra-ssi.
Still, it would be a bit much not to go.
,"You don't have to go if you don't want to."
,"How can I do that? It's my brother's wedding."
Before Mi-ra-ssi, it was my brother's wedding, so I felt like I had to show my face.
Something felt heavy and my heart sank. I didn't want to go.
In my heart, I didn't want to go, but I suppressed it with reason.
Yes, there's also the issue of hiding my identity anyway, so let's just show my face, just show my face and come back!
On the day of my brother and Mi-ra-ssi's wedding, my heart sank even more.
Is it because I looked at Mi-ra-ssi's wedding dress photo again before going?
My heart was confused.
What exactly is this jealousy?
I dressed as neatly as possible, and Shi-hyun-nim dressed up 멋지게.
,"There will probably be a lot of alumni, so be careful."
,"I know, don't worry."
There was a bigger problem for me now than that.
In the face of the problem of jealousy I felt towards Mi-ra-ssi, the alumni-related problem was secondary.
,"Even if someone recognizes you, deny it no matter what."
,"I know, right!?"
Shi-hyun-nim kept saying things that bothered me, even though my heart was already heavy.
And I got angry at such Shi-hyun-nim.
,"Sorry, I'll go to the car first."
My heart was complicated.
Damn it!
I was so confused and it was hard to control my emotions. My period is still a long way off, but I don't know why I'm like this.
My steps towards the car were heavy.
Shi-hyun-nim seemed shocked and stood still in that spot.
Shi-hyun-nim, who chased after me belatedly, apologized to me.
,"I'm sorry, did I emphasize it too much?"
,"No, I have to be careful, yes, I have to be careful."
Shi-hyun-nim looked lukewarm at my reaction.
,"Shall we go?"
,"Yeah."
The heart is such a complicated thing.... I tried to organize my heart and tried to hide it as if it wasn't.
I'll be seeing my parents, brother, and Mi-ra-ssi soon, so I have to be careful....
I have to hide my heart and bless Mi-ra-ssi and my brother's future.
Mi-ra-ssi's wedding dress appearance lingered in my head again.
Wedding dress.... Is that what's bothering me?
Damn it, I don't know, I don't know.