The word "Hero." Just hearing that name makes you feel reassured.
That's because heroes stand for justice. Setting aside ideologies and all that, they consistently stand for "justice," which is why we can trust them.
But let's say that hero becomes hostile toward me, even attacks me, and goes a step further by trying to kill me.
Could I still trust them just because they're a "Hero"?
I can say with confidence.
No way. Absolutely not.
"..."
"...*munch munch*"
...Of course, after saying all that, letting her into my home just because of a pizza is a bit of an error.
But hey, she's holding my food, so what can I do? I need to eat to survive.
And even if she did try to kill me before, she probably wouldn't act up in Hyun's house.
Yes, it's definitely not because of the pizza—it's because I believe I'll be safe in Hyun's house.
"Excuse me."
"Grrrr..."
"Ah, right... I won't disturb you while you're eating."
Let me say it again: I absolutely did not let her into the house because she was holding my Hawaiian pizza.
I glanced back and forth between the pizza and Ryu Hwa before taking a big bite.
The savory bread and cheese filling my mouth, the tangy pizza sauce, the flavorful bacon, and the pineapple that had become even sweeter after being baked.
The taste was so heavenly that I almost smiled, momentarily forgetting Ryu Hwa was right in front of me.
When I noticed her staring at me, I flinched and hardened my expression as I took another bite.
After devouring the entire pizza by myself, I pushed aside the remaining box and looked at Ryu Hwa.
She had been staring at the empty pizza box with a surprised expression, but when she felt my gaze, she turned toward me.
"I heard you eat a lot, so I bought an extra pizza... Did you finish it all?"
"How could I eat comfortably with you staring at me like that?"
"Ah, right. That makes sense. I guess I was staring too much."
She clicked her tongue and scratched her head with a bitter expression, looking strangely pitiful.
Wait, what? Pitiful? The person who tried to kill me by throwing an exploding paper at my head looks pitiful? Get a grip, Yu Sia.
She's a bad person. She's a bad person... Don't be fooled by her Hero profession...
After reminding myself of this, I looked at Ryu Hwa again.
"Ahem. So, why did you come here?"
"Ah... about that..."
Ryu Hwa seemed either embarrassed or nervous, trailing off and wiping her palms on her thighs.
Anyone watching would think I was conducting a high-pressure interview... Why is she wiping sweat from her hands when I'm the one who's much more nervous?
I want to wipe my hands too, but I can't.
...Is this some kind of power play?
Maybe it's because my first impression of her was so terrible, but everything she does seems negative to me. I looked at the other pizza box still on the table to calm myself down.
After composing myself, Ryu Hwa finally spoke.
"This might sound like deception at this point, but I felt I needed to say it, which is why I came."
"What are you trying to say...?"
"I'm sorry."
*Hiccup*.
I hiccupped involuntarily from surprise.
What? I never expected to hear an apology from her of all people, not even the tiniest bit, which made it all the more shocking.
I'm not trying to disparage Ryu Hwa, but when someone throws a bomb at your face the first time you meet them, it would be stranger to expect a good impression, wouldn't it?
"...As you said, I don't understand why you're saying this now."
"It's not strange for you to be angry."
Am I angry? I'm not sure. Maybe I'm just dumbfounded.
If I were truly angry, I'd be huffing and shouting, but instead, I've become calmer. So I'm probably not angry.
"I'm not angry. I just... really don't understand. At first, you called me the Light Dragon and threw a bomb at me, and when we met at the Association, you glared at me and nitpicked everything I did because you hated me so much. Now you suddenly show up to apologize."
I haven't seen Ryu Hwa for long or often, but I've learned one thing from her:
Heroes are hunters before they're heroes, and before that, they're just ordinary people.
People who are heroes to the bone, like Hyun or Noona Ha-Young, are truly rare.
I guess that's why they're S-Class Heroes.
"...Anything I say will just sound like an excuse. I'm sorry. That's all I can say."
As she bowed her head again, my thoughts became too complicated, and my heart fluttered.
It was funny that she was apologizing now, and it was bewildering that it felt sincere.
If you're going to be a bad person, stay a bad person until the end. Why pretend to be nice now?
This makes me feel like the bad guy for not accepting her apology...
[Why would that make you the bad guy? She's the one who did wrong, and forgiveness is at your discretion.]
'Light Dragon...'
[She came to apologize, not to be forgiven.]
I frowned at the puzzling statement.
Isn't coming to apologize the same as seeking forgiveness? What's the difference?
[If she truly wanted forgiveness, she would have begged for it. But has that woman ever mentioned forgiveness?]
...No.
[Forgiveness isn't something given easily. Especially forgiving someone who tried to take your life.]
"..."
[The grudge from nearly losing your life runs that deep.]
The grudge from losing something precious runs even deeper.
That's why you still haven't forgiven me.
'That's...'
[Of course, I have no intention of apologizing. I was being used too.]
The Light Dragon's calm voice made my mood sink.
Why bring that up now...
[It's just a bit of advice. Even if there's a grudge between you, if you're going to see each other often, there's no need to flush with anger every time you meet.]
If not that, then?
[Well. As I said earlier. Forgiveness is at your discretion.]
That's all I have to say. The rest is up to you.
With that, the Light Dragon fell silent.
I called out to him in my mind several times, but he didn't even acknowledge that he heard me.
As I chewed on my lip with my unnecessarily complicated thoughts, I suddenly remembered when I first met Ryu Hwa at the courthouse.
—I saw it with my own eyes, the flame that killed my husband!!!
Ryu Hwa's image, screaming as if spitting blood, her eyes bloodshot with burst capillaries.
Her suffering as she couldn't accept that I wasn't the Light Dragon, even though she knew it.
—The grudge from losing something precious runs even deeper.
"...Ah."
My relationship with the Light Dragon. My relationship with Ryu Hwa. The Light Dragon's relationship with Ryu Hwa.
The situations were different, but in the end, we were all victims.
Of course, Ryu Hwa trying to kill me was her fault, but I couldn't say it was entirely her fault.
As the Light Dragon said, I know all too well how immense the grudge from losing something precious, a family member, can be.
Could I forgive her?
No, do I even have the right to forgive?
Wouldn't it be deceptive to accept her apology while hiding that the Light Dragon is still alive inside me?
...I don't know. The problem was too difficult to solve.
After thinking for a long time, the conclusion I reached was...
avoidance.
"Don't apologize."
Ryu Hwa looked surprised at my words as I subtly averted my eyes.
"Let's just pretend it never happened. I ended up not getting hurt, and you've probably already talked everything out with Hyun... We only have bad memories of each other."
I know this is irresponsible avoidance.
But I'm just an ordinary citizen, a common person.
I may have become a monster, but I'm not great enough to step forward voluntarily knowing I'll be criticized.
I didn't want to be responsible for every word I said.
The best option would be to apologize to each other and move on as if nothing happened. The second-best would be to just accept her apology for trying to kill me.
The third worst would be to accept her apology and falsely claim to forgive her. The worst would be to reveal that the Light Dragon is alive inside me and start a fight.
I didn't like any of these options.
"Let's just... forget what happened then, okay?"
"...Is it because you were created based on the Light Dragon?"
"I'm not sure about that. If that were the reason, wouldn't I be going around apologizing to everyone who was harmed by the Light Dragon by now?"
I said with a bitter smile, and Ryu Hwa made an anguished expression.
She seemed to have something she wanted to say, but she just closed her eyes and opened them again without saying anything.
"I understand what you mean, but as I said earlier, this is the only thing I can say."
I'm sorry.
Ryu Hwa said that and bowed her head once more.
"Why are you apologizing? I said let's just forget about it and move on."
"Whatever the reason, it happened because of my choice, and it's my fault, so I need to take responsibility."
"Is that because you're a Hero...?"
"No, because I'm an adult before I'm a Hero."
That statement hit me like a blow to the head, and I blinked blankly.
Looking at me, Ryu Hwa smiled bitterly and got up from her seat.
"Are you leaving?"
"Forcing the issue any further would be wrong."
After gathering her things, she paused at the front door.
"I'm sorry for being pushy today. And thank you for trusting me enough to let me in. Oh, I've already paid for the pizza, so enjoy it without worry."
Ah, and there's sauce on the corner of your mouth, make sure to wipe it off. Goodbye.
With those words, Ryu Hwa left without looking back.
"An adult before a Hero..."
Even after she left, that one phrase kept circling in my mind.