Chapter 144: [VIP | Parallel World Extra: The Perfect Sin (Part Three)]

Immersing myself in the past, temporarily detaching from the present, helped stabilize my near-breaking consciousness just a little.

I stared at the full-length mirror nearby, looking at my haggard reflection. Through the blanket, I rubbed my elastic chest and gave a bitter smile.

When Gu Fan isn’t home, it’s like my existence fades away with his absence. Am I living for myself or for him?

I don’t know… I don’t know which choice is better either, but I’m certain of what I see and feel: an endless loneliness trapping me in this upscale downtown apartment.

This place was earned with Gu Fan’s money—it has nothing to do with me.

In Gu Fan’s life, I occupy such a tiny, tiny portion, merely his wife. His work, his social circle—I have no part in any of it.

If I could, I’d want to know what Gu Fan is like outside this home. Does he show other girls the same tenderness he shows me here?

The more I think, the angrier and more aggrieved I feel. Coming back to my senses, I saw in the mirror that the black-haired cat-girl’s cheeks were once again streaming with tears.

What a useless, pathetic thing. I really want to strangle myself…

My hand reached for my neck again, but my body was too weak to exert much strength.

After a few tries, I only managed to make my face slightly paler, and instead, I choked on my tears, coughing reflexively as I bent over.

Coughing and coughing, inexplicably, I felt a wave of acid reflux rising from my stomach, a sudden urge to vomit.

No, the feeling of nausea was too overwhelming—I couldn’t hold it back.

I’d usually force myself to endure it, letting my body adjust on its own. But this time, the urge to vomit was unstoppable, surpassing my tolerance threshold.

I hurriedly threw off the blanket, wiping the tear-streaked corners of my eyes, though a few droplets still clung to my lashes.

“Ugh… it hurts so much…”

Sobbing and whimpering, I stumbled into the bathroom.

My limbs were weak and sore, and I struggled to prop my elbows on the sink. The next second, the negative emotions that had been festering inside me coalesced and surged out of my body.

My spirit, already shredded into fragments by invisible blades, seemed to melt into the disgusting mess.

Panting faintly, my face was a blur—unsure if I was smiling or crying.

I cleaned myself and the sink as best I could. During the process, the nausea surged a few more times, but I forced it back down.

After tidying up, I put on underwear and a thick sweater, threw on a coat, and sat on the edge of the bed in formal attire, holding my phone.

What now? Gu Fan still hadn’t replied to my messages, and I don’t have any hobbies. Usually, I just check my phone to keep up with his updates.

Bored, I repeatedly turned the phone screen off and on, letting my mind go blank as my thoughts wandered freely. Before I knew it, I started searching for the reason behind my vomiting.

“…Morning sickness? No way, am I really pregnant? Why now, of all times…?”

I had bought pregnancy tests before. A few months ago, Gu Fan was really eager for me to have a baby, so I’d use a test after every time we made love.

Recently, though, since I kept failing to get pregnant, Gu Fan gave up on the idea of having a baby. His approach to our intimate moments became so casual, leaving me deeply unsatisfied.

I crouched by the nightstand, rummaging for the pregnancy tests I’d tossed into a corner.

Ugh…

First, I headed to the bathroom to try and pee.

Having just vomited minutes ago, my body was incredibly weak. It took a while to manage even half a plastic cup.

After using the test strip, I waited slowly for the result, and then… I saw two red lines gradually appear.

“Two lines? Does that mean I’m pregnant or not?”

Confused, I looked it up on my phone. When I read the professional explanation about two lines on a pregnancy test, a rush of complex emotions overwhelmed me.

Why…? Why did I get pregnant now?

Maybe it’s true what they say about things happening when you least expect them. Gu Fan and I had stopped caring, and now a baby decides to show up in my belly.

But this isn’t the right time for a baby. Your dad doesn’t love us anymore…

I melancholically rubbed my stomach, unable to feel any movement yet, nor the sweet experience of unborn babies kicking that I’d read about online.

What should I do…? Should I tell Gu Fan?

After all, he’s the baby’s father. Now that we have a baby, he’ll probably spend more time at home with us.

Thinking about this, my mood lifted a bit.

On the messaging app, Gu Fan still hadn’t replied to my messages. I didn’t plan to tell him about the pregnancy over the app.

I started to scurry excitedly, then remembered I was pregnant, carrying a little life that needed its mother’s careful protection.

I slowed my pace, gently rubbing my belly to soothe the baby while smiling foolishly to myself.

I don’t understand my own mindset. Just moments ago, I was steeped in despair, but upon discovering I was pregnant, my mood began to shift for the better, like clouds parting to reveal the sun.

This house is huge—so big that when I’m alone, the overwhelming loneliness of the space stings, making my breathing quicken involuntarily.

Today, though, my steps felt unexpectedly light. I was determined to go out bravely, bring the baby’s father home, and tell him in person that we now had the fruit of our love. He needs to treat our baby well and stop sneaking off to the outside world alone.

At the very least… don’t leave me on our wedding anniversary to go sleep with another woman, okay?

A dark thought flashed through my mind, but I quickly shook my head, biting my lip lightly, warning myself not to keep imagining the worst.

Maybe Gu Fan and that woman with the sickeningly flirtatious voice are just friendly colleagues? They’re nowhere near sharing a bed.

With that thought, I cheerfully slipped my feet into my woolen ankle boots.

It’s been over three months since I last wore them. When was the last time I went out?

I can’t remember…

My hand gripped the doorknob, my heart pounding “thump, thump” relentlessly. I took a deep breath, my gaze fixed ahead, and forcefully turned the handle to open the front door.

Since I secretly installed tracking software on Gu Fan’s phone yesterday, it means the me from yesterday wanted the me of tomorrow to be brave enough to catch him if he tried to slip away from me…

It’s been two or three hours, and Gu Fan hasn’t sent any messages. Is he planning a surprise? I don’t think so.

In previous years, on our wedding anniversary, I’d always wash myself squeaky clean, wrap myself in just a bath towel, and wait on the bed to give Gu Fan the perfect intimate experience.

This year, I even sprayed on some expensive perfume I bought online. The scent is just okay, but Gu Fan should like it, right?

After all… every time he comes home late, I’ve smelled a similar perfume on his shoulders and tie…