"FurySurvival: What kind of swimsuit would suit Noel?"
"TearingApart: For kids, a frilly bikini would be pretty standard, right?"
"SilverPanthea: Host isn't a kid... She's clearly an adult ㅠ"
"PayMeNowMoneyIncoming: At 144cm, she's just an honorary child anyway"
"Dedica: What's an 'honorary child'? Haha"
"ImNotAPedo: But if Noel wears a bikini, is that legal or illegal?"
"QueenLexia: What? Are you saying disabled people wearing bikinis is illegal? Woo, you discriminator"
"ImNotAPedo: What"
"Sistato: Wooo trash"
"PleaseDeleteNatalie: Wooooo"
In the end, it's a swimsuit I'll be wearing.
Somehow Gabi seems more excited picking out swimsuits for me.
Meanwhile, viewers are enthusiastically debating which swimsuit would suit me better.
"Well, it's not like I have a pretty figure. I'm just a skinny twig, so wouldn't anything look the same on me? A mannequin would probably look better."
Even though viewers are saying nice things about me, even if they're just being polite.
I objectively know I'm not attractive.
When I was a man, I thought pale skin, clear complexion, and distinct features with large eyes were pretty.
But looking that way and feeling good when seeing it are two different things.
Well, I'm used to my reflection now so I don't think much of it.
But how others feel? I already know from my father's reaction.
"Sistato: It would be hard for a mannequin to be prettier than Noel lol"
"SilverPanthea: Host is prettier than a figurine..."
"Sistato: Height is a matter of preference but breasts are"
"TearingApart: Noel is the truth..."
"Dedica: YES!!! Noel is beautiful because there's a possibility she'll become Bread someday!!!"
"BonesCoo: What? Noel becoming Bread? This is hell..."
"SixteenDegreeBibimmyeon: No, that can't happen... There's no way Noel would grow taller day by day..."
Even amid all this, viewers were making funny comments.
I don't know what all this talk about "Noel" and "Bread" means.
But their comments about fearing I might grow taller feel like friends who want their short friend to stay small forever.
So even though I know they're just joking, I can take it without feeling bad.
Actually, it's kind of fun.
It feels like they're throwing a tantrum saying, "Don't grow taller!"
"You don't need to worry about that. I won't grow any taller from here. There's talk about men growing taller even after military service, but women's growth plates close earlier than men's. I'll probably stay at 144cm forever."
I tried to reassure the viewers with what they wanted to hear.
Truthfully, I don't know if my growth plates have closed.
My actual age is twenty, that's true.
But I don't know if my physical age changed after becoming a woman.
Considering I haven't even started my period, there's a possibility I might have gotten younger.
Anyway, I'm twenty.
If I grow taller later, I can just say I didn't know.
...Hmm, have I learned something bad from Jaemin?
"Ta-da, Noel. I brought swimsuits that might suit you."
While I was chatting with viewers, my judgment time finally arrived.
Gabi brought colorful swimsuits.
Even at a glance, the swimsuits didn't cover much area.
But swimsuits with large coverage are basically just wetsuits.
We're going to the beach, so I can't wear something like that, so I'll have to accept these swimsuits.
...Or wait, since we're going to the beach, would it be okay to wear a wetsuit?
"Ah, thanks."
Even though I'm not thrilled about wearing a swimsuit,
I'm grateful that Gabi went through the trouble for me.
So I thanked her and accepted the swimsuits.
Then Gabi put her handbag on my wheelchair and prepared to support me.
"No need to thank me. Come on, let's go change. Come to think of it, wheelchairs are really convenient. We can put stuff on them, right?"
"They can handle up to 160 kilograms. I think it would be fine to carry groceries. Instead of using the trunk, you could load things here after shopping at the mart."
"Hmm, I don't think they made it to withstand 160 kilograms for that purpose. It's probably because people who actually weigh that much need to use wheelchairs, right?"
"Oh... I guess Americans can weigh that much."
"Koreans would probably die from pancreatic failure before reaching that weight. Come on, get up. Let's go to the changing room and try on swimsuits."
I wondered if it was okay to leave the handbag outside.
But there are CCTVs, and there's only us and the department store staff here.
I remember asking Gabi what women carry in their handbags, and she said she only carries her phone, various coupons, and basic medications.
I almost asked if she was some kind of medic.
But then I thought it was actually quite sensible.
After hearing that, I started carrying cold medicine, bandages, and ointment in my bag too.
I remember my mother seeing it one day and laughing a lot.
...I paused momentarily as my mother's face came to mind.
But there's no bitterness left with her now, so it didn't make me feel bad.
It's just a memory.
Anyway, no one's going to take our stuff.
Especially in our country with good public safety.
Of course, if it were a bicycle, that might be different, but a wheelchair isn't a bicycle.
Are there people who target them because they're similar concepts?
Anyway, I flip my phone over.
I need to adjust the camera lens angle so it doesn't show the department store staff.
That way, viewers can see and evaluate me each time I come out in a swimsuit.
We decided to take votes on the spot and buy the one that suits me best.
"I'll be back soon in a swimsuit. Please remember which one looks best. I won't be able to respond to chat while changing..."
"SilverPanthea: Take care"
"Welcum: You go well"
"TearingApart: Come to think of it, Noel's hoodie is so big I can't tell if she's wearing pants or not"
"Sorton: It's a bottomless fashion... but that doesn't mean not wearing pants at all. Usually there are hot pants or dolphin shorts underneath"
"QueenLexia: How does Sir Namgung know this?"
"Sorton: Read Maximus in the military"
"Maximus: Maximus can't resist"
Fortunately, viewers are good at entertaining themselves.
They won't all leave just because I step away for a moment.
After all, they're still here even after hearing I'm changing into swimsuits instead of gaming.
When Gabi and I went to the changing room,
She handed me a palm-sized sticker.
"What's this?"
"You put this on when trying on swimsuits. Otherwise, it's unpleasant for the next person."
"I see. ...We didn't do this with underwear. Why didn't you give me one then?"
"Bras and swimsuits are different."
I think I would have felt less uncomfortable if she had given me these when buying underwear.
I wonder why she's only giving them to me now.
Still, better late than never.
At least it's better than hesitating over a swimsuit someone else might have worn.
So I undress and change into the first swimsuit I grab.
Gabi must have considered me, as the swimsuit covered quite a lot for a swimsuit.
As some viewer mentioned, the frilly swimsuit had no shoulder straps.
But since I have no breasts, I don't need to worry about it slipping down.
The frills also acted like a skirt, making it feel less like walking around in underwear.
Of course, "less" doesn't mean "not at all."
No matter how much the frills act like a skirt, how long can they be?
Just barely reaching my thighs means it's much shorter than the hoodie I wear.
"Hmm. I think something else might be better..."
"You don't like the color? To my eyes, it's just pretty and cute. Your skin is so white that this design works for you. Let's show the viewers first."
"Okay, I understand."
We made a promise, so unless it's physically uncomfortable, I should just endure my own discomfort.
Since I won't be seeing myself anyway, what matters is how others see me.
In that sense, wouldn't it be better to find a swimsuit combination that looks less unpleasant?
So I left the changing room and awkwardly hopped to where the phone camera was recording.
Hop, hop. After doing that, I felt embarrassed and couldn't last three seconds before rushing back to the changing room with a flushed face.
"I'm back."
"What did everyone say? They said it suits you, right?"
"The phone was too far away to see the chat."
"What? You should have checked. Well, I'm not saying go check now. After we finish this fashion show, we'll get the overall verdict. Next is this one."
"...I know this one. It's what little kids wear. If I wear this, I'll really look like a child."
I hesitated when Gabi handed me another swimsuit.
A blue one-piece swimsuit.
Isn't this the kind only children wear?
Considering my short height, at most equivalent to a 3rd or 4th grader,
If I wear this swimsuit, people might really mistake me for an elementary school student.
"You still have to try it on. If it doesn't suit you, viewers won't vote for it anyway."
Yes, as embarrassing as it was, Gabi was right.
If an adult like me wears a swimsuit meant for children, wouldn't that create an uncanny valley effect?
Suppressing my embarrassment, I changed into the blue one-piece swimsuit.
Then stood before the viewers again.
Trusting their judgment to sense any discomfort from my appearance.
"But do you dislike looking young that much?"
"No, that's not the issue. I'm worried about misunderstandings. How embarrassed would people be if they thought I was a child and then heard 'Actually, I'm an adult'?"
"Well, that would be good for both parties. Now, next. This is the adult swimsuit you wanted, right?"
As Gabi said, this one emphasized fashion more than functionality.
Instead of shoulder straps, a floral fabric wrapped around the chest, with another piece around the neck for stability.
The bottom part included a palm tree-printed fabric to wrap around the waist.
At least it had the least exposure among the swimsuits I'd seen so far.
The fabric around the neck didn't feel bad either.
After that came a plain black two-piece swimsuit and a pink one-piece that girls might wear.
Each time I showed them to the viewers, my face burned, and I couldn't even see their chat.
Now it was time for the verdict on which of the five swimsuits suited me best.
"Okay, please vote. I saw there's a voting function last time. I'll list them all, and you can choose in one minute."
I thought the adult-like swimsuit or the first white frilly one would get the most votes.
Personally, I hoped the one with the least exposure would win.
But I also thought the white frilly swimsuit Gabi said suited me wasn't bad.
For one minute, viewers discussed among themselves and cast their votes.
"Alright, I'll reveal the results. Your choice is..."