“I’m home…”
In a daze, feeling dreamy, I returned home. It truly felt like a dream.
With my first girlfriend, holding hands for the first time, and walking home together for the first time. Everything was a first, and even though more than a year had passed since I started school, the familiar school and commute felt like a completely different scene. This is what it means for the world to change.
I tried my best to remain calm and collected, but looking back, I hardly remember what we talked about on the way home.
I was nervous, but more than that, I was probably ecstatic over the fact that a stunning beauty named Yuriko Shirasaki had become my girlfriend.
Damn, it’s crazy… remembering it again makes me grin like an idiot—
“Welcome home, Mao.”
For a moment, I wondered who she was talking about. But I quickly realized it was my name. It felt as if I hadn’t been called by that name for a long time.
But rather than such trivial matters, my attention was drawn to the person standing in front of me, as if waiting for me to enter the house.
“Sis… what’s with that luggage?”
Standing there to greet me was my little sister, Kuroha Mana, with a pretty face that somehow still looks great with twin tails even in university. Setting aside any biases, she’s someone anyone would recognize as a beauty. She’s not inferior to Yuriko—no, now that I think about it, my bias certainly leans towards Yuriko when it comes to beauty.
Now, that cute Mana-neechan was carrying a huge suitcase that I only see when she goes abroad.
“I won’t be home for a while.”
She said this with a doll-like expression, as if it was nothing. She wasn’t angry or in a bad mood. That blank expression is just her natural state.
“Wait, are you running away from home?”
“Half right.”
“No way, really!?”
I said it partly as a joke, but I never thought it would be right. My sister, who is always so well-behaved, is not the type who does things like this. Could this be a late-onset rebellious phase?
“Starting today, I’m living with my boyfriend.”
She looked either really happy or had some impure thoughts. Her usual poker face crumbled, her cheeks turned red, and her mouth loosened.
Damn, was I making a face like that just a moment ago…? Siblings both being lovestruck is embarrassing.
“But Dad and Mom definitely wouldn’t allow that.”
Well, that would be the point of running away, huh. But if that’s the case, then it’s completely just a runaway situation and not just “half right.”
“You don’t need their permission. Because starting today, they’re both gone.”
“…Huh?”
“Dad is on a long overseas business trip, and Mom went with him.”
“Huh!? What the heck is that, it sounds like a scenario from a dating simulation game, it’s impossible! And it’s way too sudden. There hasn’t exactly been any setup or foreshadowing for this until now.”
“There’s a letter on the living room table that says, ‘Please take care of things from here on out.’”
“That’s it!? Wait, that’s just absurd!”
“But they’ve already left.”
No matter how much I scream “this is impossible,” the reality seems unchangeable. My sister has no reason to be lying at this moment. If she really were running away, then being a smart girl, she would have thought of a better lie and made more thorough plans.
“Wait, does that mean I’m the only one left in this house?”
“Don’t worry, I’ll come back from time to time.”
No, it’s definitely not okay. Am I being forced into a life alone starting today?
“Mao can cook a bit and is tidy, so I think you’ll be fine?”
“Well, I won’t say it’s impossible, but…”
Everything is happening way too suddenly.
“Then if something happens, just call my cell. The address of my boyfriend’s apartment is written down in the letter.”
As if saying, “There’s nothing else for me to say,” my sister pulled the black, hefty suitcase and rolled it out the door.
—
“So, that’s how it is. I’m in a state of living alone.”
“Wait, what!? What kind of lewd game protagonist situation is that!?”
The one screaming out reactions similar to mine was my classmate, Saiga Youta.
The fourth period had ended, and it was finally lunchtime. I had brought up the unexpected forced living alone situation that had suddenly arisen just yesterday.
Well, his surprise is quite understandable, but the reaction is way too exaggerated.
“Calm down. First, let’s start by sitting down quietly.”
Standing up loudly and shouting is part of Saiga’s reaction act.
Now that I think about it, I feel like he did something similar yesterday when he got all heated up during a conversation about the girl manager of the soccer club… I wonder why it feels so nostalgic.
In fact, this friend’s appearance as an ordinary-looking guy with an otaku personality feels like I haven’t seen him in a long time.
Once again, a sense of discomfort sprouts in my heart, but thankfully, it’s not something I need to voice. I continued my conversation with my seated friend.
“Well, this is unreal to think it actually happens.”
“Totally, I’m still having a hard time believing it myself.”
However, having spent the night alone really made me feel the reality of both my parents being gone.
By the way, just as my sister said, there really was a letter left on the table. “Please take care of things from here.” Just that simple phrase, bearing no warmth towards her son.
Well, whatever, my family is more on the neglectful side anyway.
“Honestly, it’s getting pretty enviable. If you had a girlfriend too, I’d be so jealous I’d probably curse you, shout explode and stuff!”
I’m really glad that Kuroha is single—hahaha, as I saw Saiga laugh, my expression froze.
“Eh, what’s with that reaction? Shouldn’t we be laughing together or being disappointed?”
“Well, how should I put it… um…”
I never intended to hide it, but it’s hard to say in this flow. But if I deny it here, it would mean I’m lying, which is also delicate.
The moment I come out, I know Saiga will scream again. I can understand his exaggerated reactions.
Me, living alone. With a cute girlfriend. Expecting anything less from a 17-year-old high school boy in this scenario is asking too much.
“Huh!? Kuroha, you’re not saying… no way!”
Faced with my obvious reaction, he finally got it. Damn it, here goes nothing.
“Actually, I got a girlfriend yesterday.”
“No way, really!? Who!?”
“…Yuriko.”
“Die you face-only yankee!”
The simultaneous slap to the face coupled with insulting comments about my appearance. It’s utterly unreasonable, but seeing my friend cry in a dramatic manner, I can do nothing but accept it.
“What the heck, you didn’t seem like it at all! Why did you suddenly confess!?”
“No, Yuriko asked me out—”
“Die! Seriously, die, you convenient world bastard!”
“C-Calm down!”
As I warded off the cat punches raining down on me, I tried to soothe him. Well, it’s probably pointless for me to say anything.
“Hey, Kuroha, it seems our friendship is ending today…”
“You seriously declare a breakup out of nowhere? That’s kind of harsh.”
“No, it’s fine, Kuroha, you don’t have to force yourself. If I’ve entered a personal route with the heroine, then the role of the best friend guy is over.”
“Stop comparing everything to a dating sim, you game-brain.”
Well, I’ve heard of the pattern where once someone gets a girlfriend, they forget about their friendships and get all excited, but I find it unfair for that to be the impression I give.
“Say what you want. Look at reality; what part of that has room for me to intervene…?”
With a determined look of a man resigned to despair, Saiga stood up, bento in hand. His gaze wasn’t on me but headed for the classroom door.
“…Ah, Yuriko.”
There she was, the girl with distinctive light amber hair. Carrying what looked like a lunchbox in her hand.
“Well, go on then, Kuroha. Your cute girlfriend is waiting.”
On my face still marked with tears, Saiga wore a cynical smile. Even though he’s just an ordinary-looking guy, he looked unexpectedly cool.
“…Thanks.”
“Don’t mention it. Be happy with Yuriko.”
With that, he left the scene with an aura like a gunslinger walking into the wasteland.
I whispered, “Thanks,” and headed toward Yuriko.
But if this isn’t an invitation to have lunch together, then it’s way too embarrassing…
—
“How is it, Kuro No-kun… delicious?”
My worries were unfounded. Truly, Yuriko made me a homemade lunch.
“Ah, yeah, it’s delicious.”
Even if the egg sandwich in my hand was a bit unappetizing, I would still say it like that. Fortunately, her handmade cooking was surprisingly good. None of the standard menu items, like fried eggs and karaage, were from the freezer.
This egg sandwich too was a far cry from the extremely plain-tasting versions I had eaten before. What could cause such a difference in something that shouldn’t have that much variance in taste?
“Good, I’m glad.”
With a straight and warm smile directed at me, I still can’t quite grasp the reality.
I mean, I too wanted a cute girlfriend like Saiga, and I had admired having lunchtime just the two of us on a bench in the courtyard as well. Yet, with it all becoming a reality, I feel like this is just a convenient dream I’m stuck in.
“Um, so…”
“What is it?”
I have a rough idea of the reason why I can’t fully believe the situation right in front of me.
“Why me?”
“Are you asking why I fell for Kuro No-kun?”
I have no clue, which ironically makes me anxious. It’s such a pathetic thing to admit.
“Yeah, not just why, but what was it that you liked about me? I don’t understand at all.”
“Why… I wonder. I guess it just happened, I realized I liked you.”
I wasn’t expecting her to say it was love at first sight, but I got an even more delicate reason than that.
Feeling a bit shocked but trying to maintain my calm, I somehow replied, “I see.”
While hiding my feelings of love, I couldn’t keep pretending to be just friends… I’m sorry, I probably made you feel like I was avoiding you this whole time, didn’t I?”
In front of her tearful expression with her thin eyebrows furrowed in an ‘X’ shape, I was shocked in another direction this time.
It’s hard to judge whether falling in love when you realize you like someone is a valid reason, but still, she was serious about it.
Somewhere in my heart, I had probably underestimated her affection. I thought it was just a matter of whether it would be okay to date her or not.
“That’s why, yesterday, I finally made up my mind. I asked everyone in the club to arrange for us to be alone together.”
“Could it be that everyone, except for me, knew about it from the beginning?”
“Yeah, I thought I was keeping it a secret at first…”
Apparently, it was obvious to others that she had feelings for me because she was acting suspiciously. I mistakenly thought she was just shy and scared. This was since last year, more than a year after joining the Literature Club.
“I-I see…”
Feeling pathetic and amazed at myself. As a man, I should have picked up on her feelings and made a move! But it was completely too late now.
“But I’m really glad I could become Kuro No-kun’s girlfriend like this. If you had rejected me, I thought I’d have to give up… but I probably wouldn’t have been able to.”
She casually squeezed my hand, and my heart raced.
Every time she whispered words of love, every time we touched, the feelings of doubt, anxiety, and hesitation within me were being filled in. To be liked. To be loved. It’s not far-fetched to believe it wholeheartedly.
“Thank you for feeling that way about me. I’m happy.”
No, I need to believe it. I should trust whether she truly likes me, what she likes about me, and why she likes me. It’s more important to respond to her feelings as soon as possible than to convince myself.
“I still don’t know much about you, Shirasaki-san, but I want to get to know you better and for us to be closer, so please teach me various things.”
“Yeah, I want to know more about you too, Kuro No-kun.”
As she returned those sweet words, Shirasaki-san leaned against me. Our hands held, arms touching, shoulders brushing. Her glossy, flaxen hair flowed.
If it continues like this, I might spill any secret…
“Hey, Kuro No-kun, do you… not have anyone you like?”
“I don’t. But I think I was curious about you, Shirasaki-san.”
There’s no way I wouldn’t be curious with a beautiful girl like her nearby. Should I say I gave up from the start? Or perhaps if we had gotten to know each other better, I might have truly fallen for her.
“Hehe, I’m happy.”
Honestly, my interest started from her cute face—a somewhat shallow affection—but it still seems to make her happy. She squeezes my arm tighter.
Oh no, if this keeps happening, I might really become infatuated…
“Then, how about your first crush?”
Would it be cool if I answered immediately with ‘You were my first’? At least, I had no intention of saying that, nor was I going to lie.
I have a first crush.
It’s a bit embarrassing—I’ve never told anyone about it until now. But I’ll be honest with Shirasaki-san.
“When I was in elementary school, I liked… or rather, admired a girl I met just once.”
That day, I was a raucous kid.
Why? The reason was simple: the first novel I wrote was ridiculed by my classmates.
The work I proudly showed off was met with a storm of criticism and mockery, and my pride was thoroughly shattered. Tears streaming down my face, I dashed out of school as the dismissal bell rang.
I didn’t feel like going straight home; instead, I ran in the opposite direction of my usual route. It was a ridiculously childish escape.
Thus, I ended up at an unfamiliar park. I hadn’t intended to go there; I just thought I’d rest there because I was tired from running.
It was there that I met her.
“She was sitting on a swing with a terribly indifferent expression. If it were just that, I wouldn’t have paid her any mind, but she was holding a stack of manuscript paper.”
Since it was the same type of paper used for elementary school essays, I recognized it immediately. Given my current situation, I couldn’t help but peek at her.
Sure enough, it was a story.
“I don’t remember what kind of exchange we had at that time, but somehow, I ended up reading her novel.”
I sat on the swing next to her and read. It was interesting.
“More than that, it was shocking. That girl looked like she was at most my age, maybe even younger. Yet, the story, the characters, the writing skill—everything was perfect.”
Damn it, it was interesting, I remember telling that girl while half-crying.
It was at that moment I finally realized that my friends’ harsh critique had been a valid assessment.
As I acknowledged that, no, as I understood it, I flung my manuscript away right there. The sight of white paper scattering in the park dyed by the setting sun is something I still remember well.
“I understood that there was a sky-high difference between her and me. I felt frustrated and envious… and again, I cried on my way home.”
Still, I didn’t give up on writing, which shows I had a fair bit of determination back then.
I wanted to write something as interesting as what she created. In my childish way, I desperately tried and error, kept writing.
And after several years, I finally completed ‘The Adventures of Hero Abel.’ The main storyline was the same as what I had thrown away that day in the park. Actually, it was a remake.
“I was told by my first friend that it was interesting… well, they added the ‘for a middle schooler’ part.”
“No, I think it was interesting too.”
Feeling embarrassed to realize she had read it, I was again reminded that in the Literature Club room, member’s works are placed, so anyone can read them if they want to. If Shirasaki-san has feelings for me, it makes sense she would have picked up my clumsy light novel.
“Kuro No-kun, you’re really serious about the activities in the Literature Club. I like that about you.”
“Ah, thank you…”
When she said it with a dreamy look up at me, embarrassment won over happiness. My heart raced again.
“But… I might feel a little jealous of that girl.”
“R-Really? Even for a first crush, it was something I just kind of glorified in my head, and I don’t even remember what her face looked like anymore.”
“But when you were writing, you were probably thinking about her the whole time, right? Maybe even now.”
How sharp Shirasaki-san is. Is this the insight of a girl in love?
The memory of that girl is like the basis for me writing novels. When I write, she still comes to mind.
But then, recently I haven’t been writing at all… Wait, I did write just yesterday. So why can’t I remember the feeling of typing on my beloved laptop’s keyboard at all?
“Hehe, I’m sorry, I might have been a bit mean. The truth is, I’m not really worried.”
In front of Shirasaki-san, who smiled with such confidence, my sense of loss—I’ve lost track of how many times this has happened—vanished without a trace.
Just as I was about to get lost in her smile, I managed to regain my composure. Shaking off the temptation of her enchanting smile, I changed the topic.
“By the way, thanks for the bento. It was really delicious, thank you.”
Somehow, I finished the homemade bento. Since Shirasaki-san was either leaning on my left arm or hugging me, one hand was occupied, so if the main dish wasn’t a sandwich, I probably wouldn’t have eaten so easily.
Anyway, since I finished eating safely, there was no problem.
“Hey, would it be alright if you made it again tomorrow? I hope it’s not a bother?”
“No, I wouldn’t consider it a bother… If anything, I feel more like I’m the one at fault.”
“No, it’s only natural since I’m your girlfriend.”
I never expected there would be a woman who could say this much besides my sister. Could it be that there’s secretly a trend for traditional girls? No, I think it’s simply that Shirasaki-san is an exceptional girl. What overwhelming femininity.
“Thank you, then I’ll indulge in your kindness. The truth is, I was just thinking about what to do for lunch since my parents are not home right now.”
“Oh, I see; that’s why you didn’t bring your bento today.”
Thanks to that, I didn’t have to starve. Yesterday, I was so shocked when both my parents suddenly left that I completely forgot to think about lunch.
“It was really sudden; on top of that, my sister took the opportunity to move in with her boyfriend.”
“Oh, really… So you’re the only one at home, Kuro No-kun?”
“Yeah, I’ll be living alone for a while.”
What should I do from now on? I almost let out a complaint, but I swallowed it along with my breath.
“Then is it alright if I come over to your house next time…?”
I’m not naive enough to take her words literally. I’m just a high school student who just got a cute girlfriend; expecting nothing from this would be strange.
I understand the implications of a girl wanting to visit a guy living alone.
“Uh, well, that is…”
At the same time, my somewhat flustered response only accentuates how pathetic I am.
“Is that… not okay?”
“No, it’s not that it’s bad! It’s not that it’s bad but… is it okay?”
It’s Shirasaki-san who is questioning whether it’s okay. In this situation, my underlying desire is laid bare for all to see.
“… Yeah.”
But even so, Shirasaki-san answered. Blushing deeply, she nodded her head.
“I-I see…”
I couldn’t say anything more. Additionally, I couldn’t even look directly at her face. I forced my gaze away.
However, Shirasaki-san had been hugging my left arm this whole time, so I could not help but feel her soft touch and warmth.
In front of the temptation of such straightforward affection, my mind couldn’t function properly. What should I do—this thought loop continued.
But this state of confusion was quickly resolved. The familiar sound of the bell reached my ears.
“Oh, the chime has rung.”
“Y-Yeah, we have to hurry back!”
And just like that, I was freed from Shirasaki-san’s charm. But this was only a temporary escape.
I already made a promise. To invite her over to my house.
It seems that being completely captivated by Shirasaki-san isn’t far in the future…